the turn left turn right fate

how queer that we should meet again in all awkwardness. what were the odds? was it fate or was it jus the time for me to peel my eyes and see the bigger picture. not that i havent seen the bigger picture, but this was more of a way for me to accept the bigger picture. i wished that looking at me when saying hi or waving hi was more important than filling up some form for your gym membership or whatever that was on that table. on the bright side, at least you're finally doing something that you've always talked about - like doing that gym membership.

i realised one thing tonight - no matter how awesome i think he was, no matter how much i feel towards him now; thats all about me. what he feels and think about me - i have a rough idea on that. i knew that even as a friend to him, i would not be any special as compared to his friend. you know all that jazz about new found friends? afterall what am i to him? a nobody. i dont have a right to know what he wants, i dont have a right to demand a talk about things. i dont have any right. and i know this very clearly. play me like a puppet if you have to or want to.. i willingly let myself get played - and i know it. and i dont need to ask questions jus to hear answers i already know. i jus dont. and i dont know why you're doing this to me. but its hurting big time. the man that you've become is a stranger to me. and its fine if you're happier this way.

nevermind, jus let it go.